Expectations

For the past 15 years or so, I've been hearing people's thoughts on what parenthood is like so I had managed to form some idea in my head of what to expect. For the most part it's been pretty close although there have been a few surprises and I'm sure there will be more to come.

Starting with pregnancy, it was way better than I expected. I was really lucky and didn't have any morning sickness and never got really uncomfortable at the end (even though I was huge). Overall, I had a really good time being pregnant. As for labor, it's hard to say whether it hurt more or less than I expected because it's really hard to image what it will feel like. Even now, looking back I've already started to forget what it felt like (I'm sure Brad could remind me though). I guess the part I didn't expect was how long the pushing would take. My face looked like I just fought Mike Tyson when I was finished. I also did not expect to need my mother as much as I did. It was so nice to have her at the delivery and to have her help afterward.

As for being a mother, it was not something that hit me all at once. It was really fun to meet her for the first time, but I've grown to love her more and more each day. I think the thing that surprised me most was that I am still the same person. I didn't turn into all the mothers who I've talked to. For now, I'm just me with another person to love and take care of.

The biggest physical thing I didn't expect was how hard breastfeeding is. People tried to warn me, but it was hard to imagine how difficult it could be (both mentally and physically). I had sooo much milk that Ella couldn't keep up which ended up in a breast infection with a 102 deg fever. It's going much better now although she still has a hard time latching on. Sometimes I get frustrated with her for taking so long to figure it out and then she'll let out a big toot and then I feel bad because it was just her tummy that hurt. I guess that's my first lesson she's taught me, you never know what other people are going through.

Lastly, is my expectations about how Brad would react. I kind of figured he would be a little more of a concerned parent than me and that he would try to get out of changing diapers, both of which he has done. I don't mean this in a bad way, but what I didn't expect was how tender and patient he would be. He has been so nice to both of us and hasn't complained at all about the lack of sleep and other inconveniences. I have such a great husband!